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Reality Lust for Love

Chapter 5 - Too Good to be True
Copyright ©



Coffee With the Man In Gray


I cracked open the truck door and stepped out into the dark night.  I purposefully told my heart it must now shut down; it could not lean on him or hope in his love anymore if it was to survive. 

I began my walk to my door and heard him drive away.  At 5 a.m. Wednesday morning he sent me a text wishing me the best.  I deleted it.  I deleted his number from my phone.  I threw away everything he had ever given me, the way he had thrown away my heart that night at the fair. 

I couldn’t stand sitting alone at home so I went out.  It was the diner we had always gone to, me and him.  Late night talks into the early hours of the morning.  The thought of him made me ill but yet somehow being here made me feel not so alone. 



I found a quiet seat hidden away from the rest of the world.  I ordered coffee and smiled politely to the waitress as I mentioned it was all I was having that night.  I felt as though I had gone into an auto pilot mode of existing.  The world seemed cruel as I looked around the room.  Everyone looked happy and nobody seemed to notice my bleeding heart.  I felt forsaken and alone as I stirred my coffee.  What was I going to do? 

I gazed out the window, my focus on nothing at all as my thoughts danced in a million endless circles.  I sat this way for what seemed like an eternity when two bright headlights flashed into my sight, bringing me back to my senses.  I watched as the lights went out and the car door opened.  After a moment a tall figure stepped out, a man.  He was dressed in the color grey.

Dangerous New Hope


I remember the smell as he came into the room…it was intoxicating. 

Everything about him was intoxicating.  I was over at a corner table, hidden.  It was raining that night.  I was so lonely, rejected. 

My fingertips gripped tightly around my hot coffee mug as I gazed in front of me at the sight coming through the restaurant door.  He was breathtaking.  His air was confident and unstoppable.  I quickly looked away.  I couldn’t let him see me staring.  My cheeks flushed red and my heart rate quickened as I watched his reflection in the window glass. 

I glanced up just for a moment.  He was leaning against the counter and staring straight at me; his smile showed a hint of mystery.  His eyes were ice blue, clear and entrancing, his tall, handsome frame flawless, cut and perfect.  I was startled to see him looking at me and looked quickly away. 

I felt so ridiculous.  ‘He probably wasn’t even looking at me.’  I muttered to myself.  I quickly gave myself a reality check and stirred my coffee nervously, tapping the spoon on the side of the mug and taking a quick sip.  I wondered if he had left yet.  “Are you waiting on someone?”


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(Return from reality lust  to lust verses love)

 

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